Emotional Raindrops.

 

   Lately thoughts have been trapped in my mind. Thoughts people never thought I had. With the smiles and laughter I give out, It seemed like nothing was wrong in my life. Like a volcano, once the heat reaches its maximum level flames of inferno, glowing liquid gush out.

   Im not the type of person to speak my mind easily. I go with everything and anything people say. Slowly tend to be used by others and yet I never complain a thing. I give them time to grow up and think as a better person in life. But I was wrong, people keep telling me Im being used and manipulated for the knowledege I own.

  I get played on easily because maybe of my size, my looks, my race, my religion, my class etc. Never had them thought that I spared their feelings. I know my limits when my mouth opens. What is said cannot be unsaid. Before I open my big mouth I think twice and I lay silent.

  I don't like to talk behind people's back nor do I like to speak my mind. Either way, I hurt the person. Thank Goodness there is someone who lent and ear. Jo Vin. Its been 3 years we've known each other and you never fail to listen to my craps and nags. Thankyou.

  I realise what you've said, its just that kinda situation which I call 'deep shit'. When every road is a dead end, when a tunnel has no light at the end. I just hope by the grace of God, they get to realise before I suffer or blow my top. I dont wanna open my mouth. I practice patience.

  Like you said before, patience has limits and I guess Im close to errupting. But all that is put on pause. I have much things to worry about and thats PMR. Im just happy I've found someone to really breakout to and actually have the mutual feeling as me. Its crazy how you thought I could put up with alot whereas deep inside Im controlling all the rage in me.

  Still, all your words were true. & you're the 1st I'd thank for knowing how I felt along. thanks dude :D

thilaCamillo